I was sitting in a coffee shop having my ”quiet time” when God told me He wants to meet me face to face. He told me He wants me to separate myself, and that I needed to go to the mountains.
Then He gave me this scripture,
Micah 4:10 – ”…for now you must leave the city to camp in the open field…there you will be rescued. There the Lord will redeem you out of the hand of your enemies.”
A few minutes later, a lady I had met ”randomly” in a different coffee a week or two back, approached me saying that the Lord wants me to get out of the city for a bit and that perhaps I should stay with them for a few days.
I thought ”no way-I don’t even know you – what if..” The Lord interrupted my argument by whispering the words into my heart I had read. The only words that came out of my mouth were –
”Where do you live?”
She said: ”In the mountains.”
I was like, dude, no way!! God is so cool. I simply agreed, requesting her telephone number. She left soon after and the Lord gave me the specific instructions for the leave He wanted me to apply for which included the exact dates for my adventure. This was short notice but I knew if this was God’s plan, my boss would be more than happy to give it to me … and yes, it was approved the same day!
Now, how to get there? I was so nervous, I thought these people could be psycho’s or part of some cult. But the Lord gave me scripture after scripture; Here is one of them –
2 Samuel 14:14 – ”Like water spilled on the ground which cannot be recovered, so we must die. But God does not take away life; instead, He devises ways so that a banished person may not remain estranged from Him.”
This was a really tough season for me, I had been through hell. I had back-slidden to the extent of destroying myself. Only God could save me! I did not have a cent to spare so this was ”An act of desperate faith!”
I can’t remember how it all came about, I think the lady that lived in the mountains arranged it, I landed up meeting a couple at the petrol station that would take me to meet with the Lord. Again, these were complete strangers. I thought – ”My dad would so kill me if he knew what I was doing!” I bit my lips, and reclined in the back seat of their car, in a sheepish way so as to make myself invisible to them while we journeyed. I was petrified!
I stared out the window, hoping to avoid eye contact and conversation at all costs. Remember, I was ”damaged and ashamed”. I lost confidence in everything and everyone. I was not my usual ”chatty-can’t-shut-up-self!”
The lady sitting in the left front seat turned looking back at me. She asked if I understood God’s restoration plans for me regarding the people I had judged and whether or not I knew what had happened to me in my mother’s womb!? I was flabbergasted! Could one possibly remember things that occurred as a baby in your mom’s tummy??? Frowning, I looked at her and shook my head slightly while wincing my eyes in disproof.
She continued, sharing what God was doing in their lives (Phew – they were Christians! Major sigh of relief! No serial killers in the car!) My tense shoulders sagged a bit due to this bit of insight. I no longer had to hold onto the cars door latch to jump out! 😉
While she spoke, varied emotions boiled inside of me. I could not quite figure out why. Suddenly memories start flashing through my mind! Things that just did not seem possible. Tears streaming down my face, I vulnerably wiped them away onto my cardigans sleeve. As the Holy Spirit counselled and taught me, I felt remorse and healing impart into my heart.
Matthew 7:1-2 – ”“Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”
You see, what God revealed was that if you judge others, whether in deed, thought or word you become like them or possibly even worse. For example – a young boy could judge his dad for cheating on his mom, and then when he gets married, he does the same thing and grieves as this was not who he wanted to be. Another scenario, you could judge someone for being a drunk, for being promiscuous or for having an abortion but beware lest the same judgement come upon you.
How would this prideful species ever be truly humbled if it were not for the truth of this very powerful scripture. I was brought low, to the lowest point, to come to the knowledge of the truth that indeed set me free.
This was by no means a ”quick fix” or a short repentance, it took me forever and up until this very day, I find my self having to prayerfully seek the Lord and repent for my judgment of others mentioning the actual things I judged them for.
The Holy Spirit lead in a prayer similar to this:
”Lord Jesus, I am so sorry. I did not realize why I had become the way I did.
I am so sorry for judging (the person’s name) for hurting me, for rejecting me, for using drugs, for hurting my dog, for raping that lady, for … (whatever it is, that you ”dislike” about the person or disagree with to the extent that it upsets you and keeps you captive in un-forgiveness toward them).
Please forgive me, I forgive and release (persons name) for these sins, and I ask that You would set me free. I ask Lord that You would completely shatter the bridge that I created between myself and (persons name).
Please remove this judgment from me as I humble myself. Not because I agree with their actions, but because I want my actions to be pure before You. Thank You that You are the judge and that You are merciful.
Thank You for showing me this sin so that I may be who You want me to be. Please keep showing me whenever I judge someone so that I may purify my heart and have clean hands before You. In Jesus Name.”
And this was only what happened in the car on the way to the mountains! There are many exciting events that occurred that week which I will share at a later stage should the Lord lead me to do so.
Bless you in Jesus Name.